Grief Ritual
cleansing our spirits in community heart ritual
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WHAT: a group ritual of movement, song, and devotion
WHY: to heal, to open our hearts, to free up energy so we can live our purpose well and love each other
THIS IS FOR YOU IF:
There’s something heavy in your heart. You want to lighten the weight of how you feel when you think about about life and being a part of our society today.
You long to connect with something bigger... with spirit and with community.
There are things in life that are really important to you and you’re not doing them because you experience despair often and you’re ready to move on and do them.
You love group ritual, embodiment, and song as ways to bring our hearts together.
GRIEF MEDICINE: READ Z’S BLOG ABOUT THEIR FIRST GRIEF RITUAL
NOTE ON CULTURAL ACKNOWLEDGEMENT:
This ritual is inspired by Sobonfu Some of the Dagara Tribe in Burkina Faso who is no longer with us in body. Before she transitioned we asked her about sharing this work. Her intention was to bring these rituals to the Western world. She thought we might need them even more than her own village. She said, "if you borrow your neighbor's pot to cook dinner, enjoy the dinner and acknowledge that you used your neighbor's pot." She also asked us to contribute 10% of every ritual back to Wisdom Spring. We have also created variations on the grief ritual Sobonfu offered. Our intention is to honor and respect the Dagara Tribe as well as to create what is culturally relevant for us now.
what people are saying about trembling open:
“This experience will allow you to access and process grief in a way you could not imagine. I was hesitant to sign up with something so intimate and personal in a large group. I very clearly felt that the space was safe and I could move into it slowly and safely. Truly transformative.” - Jenny
“Z & Sasha deeply honor the essence of the Dagara grief ritual tradition while bringing each their own sacred embodied medicine to the mix. The result was as gentle and loving as it was potent - this work moves mountains and frees up so much space to Love!"
“Imagine a world where where emotions could be shared openly, where dance and song and ritual and sharing were were what we did together as we healed.” - Alison Einbender, psychologist
“I wasn't sure I could release grief in front of strangers but by the time I was ready, I didn't feel surrounded by strangers. I felt a thread of connection that allowed me to participate without being self-conscious. I felt confident that I would be supported in going only as deep as was comfortable for me at the time. When it was over, I felt something had shifted on a cellular level, that my energy was refreshed and clear. Gratitude!”
“This experience is life changing. I felt lost and disillusioned with my life. This experience taught me to harness my energy instead of being afraid of it. All of the grounding and bodywork helped me learn to use the flow of energy in my body instead of trying to push it down.”
“Epic space. Epic containment. Epic results. Freedom and juice for life are flowing through me.”
“We store ancestral traumas and stories in our bodies. The safest way to transform this is through community grief ritual. This is truly a profound gift.”
“Grief ritual is the medicine of our time!” - Hannah Idalia
“Trembling Open is an experience of our full human selves together in community. Knowledgeable, safe, and fun, the facilitators hold a container for us to deeply feel everything that’s here and open to our vibrant, radiant selves. I’m into it!” - Matt Sturm
“I feel that this work is a huge part of what’s missing in our culture. There is a sense of deep wholeness and belonging that happens through this. Grief is vitality, it is aliveness, and a crucial part of health. There is absolute magic that happens when we grieve together.” - Erika
“This ritual taught me a lot about my own nervous system and I’m going home with new tools to support me in gentleness and leading a life of deep friendship and intimacy with myself.” - Leah
“I was hesitant to attend a grief ritual because I felt more comfortable feeling my deep sadness, anger, and fear in private. Attending with my partner was such a blessing because we learned how to hold space for ALL of each other and be supported by community. Deeply healing.” - Meghan Neeley
Growth of this Work:
Z attended grief rituals with Sobonfu Somé, the primary inspiration for this work. When Sobonfu became an ancestor, Z traveled to different grief rituals to explore how we could carry this forward in a good way. Z attended rituals with Lawrence Cole, Maria Owl, Briony Greenhill, Will Rogers, Bernadette Pleasant, Sara Nics, Maybel Ovalles, Coby Leibman, and Madeleina Bolduc. Z also experimented with chosen family and fellow grief ritualists Josh Fox and Chaya Leia. Z also reached out to many of Sobonfu’s collaborators and assistants in the conversation of what is next. Over the years this work has grown through community ritual and harvest. Below are the events that Z visioned and created in service to waking the heart of our human family through grief.
Waters of the Soul Performance Ritual about Grief Ritual, NYC, Oct 20, 2017
Grief Ritual, Oakland, CA, April 5, 2018 with Z & Briony Greenhill
Grief Ritual and Inclusivity Training for Touch&Play @ Earthdance July 10 - 15, 2018 with Z & Taina Lyons
Waters of the Soul Performance Ritual about Grief Ritual, Oakland, CA, May 22 - 23, 2019
Grief Ritual and Inclusivity Training for Touch&Play @ Earthdance July 9 - 14, 2019 designed by Z & Kaitlin June with facilitation support from Leslie Blackburn, Chaya Aronson & Taina Lyons
Trembling Open: grief ritual that moves your body & honors your sexuality, Oakland, CA, Sept 13 - 15, 2019 with Z & Kaitlin June
Trembling Open: grief & eros ritual, Madison, WI, Nov 1 - 3, 2019 with Z & Sasha Lasdon
International Grief Council for Ritualists, Jan 7, 2020 guided by Z
Grief Ritual for Erotic Living Worldwide Festival, June 12, 2020 with Z & Bernadette Pleasant
Grief Ritual at the Ocean, Bay Area, CA, July 31, 2021 with Z & Rachel Fryke
Dancing to Heal Together after Roe, global online, June 29, 2022
Grieving Partnership with an Open Heart, global online, Aug 16, 2022
Liberated Bodies Grief Ritual (queer, trans, bipoc, somatic abolitionist, kinky, eros magicians), North Bay, CA, Oct 9, 2022
We’re Still Here: an Embodied Ritual for Healing & Pleasure in our Trans & Queer Community (post Club Q massacre), global online, Nov 23, 2022 with Z & HG Wyndell
Grieving Partnership with an Open Heart, global online, April 4, 2023
Grief & Eros Workshop, global online, June 21, 2023
Love Together: a Healing Ritual through Racial Grief, Dance, and Dreaming Out Loud, Oakland, CA, Aug 19, 2023 with Z & Ali Montgomery
Grief Ritual for Gaza: Dancing for Love & Liberation, global online, Dec 13, 2023